last night went for prayer meeting in church. It's been a while since we had this kind of meeting in church, as we were busy with other events for the past 2 months. Not sure if it was physical tiredness from the heat of the day*, or just mental "shack-ness"** - just had this sense of lethargy just prior to entering the Main Sanctuary.
But once I started to focus and praise Him through the worship and the songs, my tiredness just fell away. Not only that, my defences came crumbling down, and I was exposed before Him. With all of my sins and displeasing ways, I came into His presence. Yet He did not abandon me, nor forsook me. He called me to focus on Him again, and just give Him the glory due His name. For that I give thanks,
Pastor David shared a very simple yet deep thing about the kind of prayers that Jesus prayed in His life. They were simple prayers, that can be uttered in less than 10 seconds. Yet they were also prayers of depth, anchored in the deep theological anchors of God. He referred us to 3 prayers that Jesus prayed in the times leading to HIs crucification.
The first was in John 12:28, just prior to the upper room discourses. Pastor was saying this was a turning point in Jesus' ministry, as he moved from the masses to spending time with His disciples. The significance that Pastor brought out was that even though Jesus was at the centre of God's will, He was troubled by the events about to happen. Yet even as He was being led outside of His comfort zone, Jesus prayed the simple prayer of "Father, glorify Your Name". He recognised the fact that it was for this reason that He came to this hour. Pastor was saying that it probably took Jesus 4 seconds to say that prayer; yet the theological depth of the Glory of God's name is splendidly displayed in this quick prayer.
The next prayer that was mentioned is found in Luke 22:42, when Jesus was praying in the garden of Gethsemane. The intensity of emotions as Jesus was going through, the troubled-ness of His heart did not just go away even after He prayed that prayer in John 12. If we read the Scriptures carefully, we can see that Jesus was even more troubled to the point where he was contemplating about quitting. Pastor brought up a very interesting lesson from this, that even Jesus HImself thought about the possibility of quitting ("Father, if You are willing, remove this cup... "). Just sounds wild and out of place, isn't it, that the Lord God Almighty thought of quitting? Yet even while He thought of it, Jesus didn't quit ("... yet not My will, but YOurs be done"). So Pastor said jokingly, albeit seriously as well, this simple lesson: While it's alright to think of quitting, don't quit! Again, a short prayer, which can be said in about 5-6 seconds, one that is grounded about the gravity of the will of God.
The last prayer that Pastor took us for the evening was from Luke 23:46, just prior to Jesus giving up His life for the whole world on the cross. Pastor reminded us again that at this juncture, Jesus allowed the world to throw its whole wickedness upon His self. By letting the people do whatever evil to His body on the cross, Jesus was in a situation whereby He surrendered His will and control, and He was no longer in control. Yet, even as our Lord surrendered this control, it was not to to the world that Jesus was submitting to. Rather, it was to the Heavenly Father that Jesus gave up His control to; and in that sense, He prayed that simple prayer of "Father, INTO YOUR HANDS I COMMIT MY SPIRIT". Pastor was commenting that God held out both His hands to welcome the Lord Jesus, showing the deep love He has for His own Son. And this love is also freely given to those who are willing to commit their lives wholeheartedly into His hands.
well, I just came out of the prayer meeting with a renewed sense of unworthiness. ironic, isn't it? :p Yet, in that sense of unworthiness, I also begin to catch a glimmer of how much precious I am in His eyes. If I would turn my heart wholly over to Him, He will be with me.
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* It could also be "smoked to death" syndrome after sitting in the foodcourt in the shopping mall besides my church. Basically, the ventilation in the foodcourt is very bad, as all the oil fumes from the cooking in the food stalls don't get sucked away by the ventilation system. It's gotten worse lately, and you can see a fine mist of oil floating in the air. I'm serious...
** Don't wanna say it could be spiritual attack, cos' my friend always tells me not to over-spiritualise things. Which is true, to a certain extent. Physically tired just say you're tired la, don't try to give excuses. :p
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